as for the job, it's going well. i have a lot of respect for the founder and my clinical director. they're visionary spirits. over the past several years of teaching and being in graduate school i have grown into my own philosophy about therapy and about life in general. what i found at this organization is a philosophy that fits well with what's been in my heart for a long time but had never quite found a place to fit into. i'm stoked about all the training i'm getting as well in this relational model. starting in january, it'll be 12 hour work days....
so it's the new year tomorrow and i've been giving a lot of thought as to what it means to me. flipping back through pages of 2008, i find a lot of frustration and anxiety which led me to reevaluate my life on many levels. there were crossroads and confusion, and now looking back i can see so much clearer exactly where the roads crossed and where each of them led... i'm glad i made the decisions i did because when it came down to the nitty gritty, i took heed of that voice inside, and it pointed me in the right direction. i have grown to believe that decision-making gets easier the more i practice. the more often i listen to my "gut" when making decisions, the easier it is to trust it the next time.
i learned a lot this year, that's for sure. a lot of changes, but i've learned to adapt. just like decision-making, learning to adapt takes practice, too. the only thing you can count on in this life is that things will never stay the same. we are constantly growing and changing. learning to accept this and flow with the changes is essential. gaining age in numbers is one thing, but continuing to nurture your personal growth and pursuing knowledge is crucial to gain wisdom with aging every year. i'm not too upset about turning 27 (even though the number 30 scares the hell out of me) because i know i'm on a path of wisdom. i hope i can say 10 years from now that i've earned these wrinkles in meaningful virtuous experiences that i would never ever trade for a fresh young face.
i have a good feeling that the new year is going to be extraordinary. i have a bookmark that says "expect miracles." i like the bookmark but never really believed i should expect a miracle. what is a miracle anyway? do they even happen anymore? i thought god was done making those things happen long before we were all born. i bet oprah would tell me that i should always be expecting one, the law of attraction, but i don't quite buy that either. i've come to believe that miracles can come in big or little packages. sometimes they can even be overlooked if you don't have the eyes yet to see them, and maybe even obtaining the eyes is a miracle in itself. i think i've had lots of miracles happen in my life (i think we all have) and it saddens me to think that i've missed a large portion of them. i've got brand new eyes this year, and i'm keeping them wide open. i'm gonna see some miracles, i'm telling you, and they've only just begun to appear. i look forward to sharing them over the course of the weeks and months ahead...